Children's Behaviour
I have created this page as an additional resource for parents, caregivers, and professionals seeking to understand fundamental aspects of children's behaviour. I hope this content supports and guides you on your journey!
Childhood is a time of growth, exploration, and learning, where behaviour plays a vital role in expressing needs, emotions, and interactions with the world. Every child’s behaviour is shaped by a unique combination of developmental stages, environmental influences, and individual temperament.
At Little OKA, we view behaviour as an essential form of communication, offering insights into a child’s inner world. By understanding and supporting children’s behavioural needs, we can help them thrive in their emotional, social, and developmental journeys.
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Understanding Children's Behaviour
Children’s behaviour can vary widely, and understanding what is typical versus atypical is an essential first step for parents, caregivers, and allied health professionals.
Typical behaviour includes curiosity, boundary-testing, and expressing emotions like joy, frustration, or sadness.
Atypical behaviours may involve persistent difficulties in communication, extreme reactions to stimuli, or behaviours that disrupt daily life, like prolonged tantrums or withdrawal.
Understanding these behaviours in the context of a child’s developmental stage helps families identify when additional support might be beneficial.
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Factors Influencing Behaviour
Children's behaviour is shaped by a combination of factors, including:
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Environment: Home stability, school settings, and peer relationships all play significant roles.
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Parenting Style: Positive reinforcement, consistency, and emotional support encourage healthy behaviour.
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Genetics: Inherited traits can influence temperament, energy levels, and emotional regulation.
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Neurodevelopment: For some children, conditions like autism, ADHD, or sensory processing disorders can influence behaviour and interactions.
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Recognising these influences helps parents create a nurturing and supportive environment.​
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Behaviour as Communication
​Children often use behaviour as their primary means of communication, especially when they lack the language or emotional skills to express their needs. For example:
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Tantrums might indicate frustration, hunger, or overstimulation.
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Withdrawal could signal fear, anxiety, or sadness.
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Defiance might stem from a need for independence or unmet expectations.
By viewing behavior as a form of communication, parents and caregivers can better understand the underlying needs and address them constructively.
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Supporting Positive Behaviour
Encouraging positive behaviour in children involves proactive strategies:
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Set Clear Expectations: Provide simple, consistent rules that children can understand.
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Use Positive Reinforcement: Reward desired behaviours with praise, attention, or small rewards.
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Model Good Behaviour: Demonstrate kindness, patience, and problem-solving in your actions.
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Practice Emotional Regulation: Teach children how to identify and manage their emotions in healthy ways.
Supportive approaches help build trust, self-esteem, and resilience in children.
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Common Behavioural Challenges
Many children experience challenges such as:
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Tantrums and Meltdowns: Often a result of frustration or overstimulation.
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Social Difficulties: Struggling to make friends or understand social cues.
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Anxiety: Expressing fears or avoidance of certain activities or situations.
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Inattention or Hyperactivity: Difficulty focusing, sitting still, or following instructions.
Understanding the root causes of these behaviours allows parents to guide children effectively, often with the help of therapeutic interventions when needed.
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The Role of Therapy
Therapy provides a structured, supportive environment for addressing behavioural challenges. Through specific programs, children can learn:
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Communication Skills: Replacing challenging behaviours with verbal or nonverbal communication.
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Emotional Regulation: Strategies to identify and manage feelings like anger or anxiety.
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Social Skills: Improving interactions with peers and adults.
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Coping Mechanisms: Techniques for handling stress or sensory sensitivities.
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​​Remember: Children are like sponges, absorbing the environment around them and mirroring the behaviours, emotions, and attitudes they observe. From a young age, they are highly perceptive, picking up on both the spoken and unspoken cues in their surroundings. Parents and caregivers, as primary role models, play a significant role in shaping a child’s understanding of the world. Whether it’s the way adults manage stress, express emotions, or interact with others, children reflect these behaviours in their own actions and responses. By fostering a positive, supportive, and nurturing environment, parents can help children develop healthy emotional regulation, social skills, and resilience.
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At Little OKA, we work collaboratively with families to address behavioural concerns while focusing on the child’s strengths and unique needs. Together, we aim to create a path for growth, connection, and joy.
Wisdom of the Australian Aboriginal Culture
Many years ago, I came across a report developed by lifeline.org.au and titled "Wellbeing and Healing Through Connection and Culture" (Link to Full Report). The content of this report deeply resonated with me, particularly because of its striking similarities to other Indigenous cultures around the world, which I hold in high regard. Towards the end, the report introduces a concept called "The Dance of Life." It is such a profoundly beautiful idea that I felt compelled to share it with all of you - see the table below for more details.
In Australian Aboriginal culture, the childhood phase is viewed as a profoundly important period for developing identity, connection to the land, and relationships with family and community.
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Aboriginal people traditionally emphasise the holistic development of a child, which includes spiritual, emotional, physical, and mental wellbeing. Children are considered to hold a sacred role within the community, as they represent both the present and the continuity of a long-term responsibility of keeping cultural knowledge and traditions.
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Importantly, play and storytelling are integral tools for teaching children about their heritage, values, and responsibilities to the environment and community.
In terms of healing, Aboriginal Australians view it as a holistic process that is deeply connected to the land, spirituality, and the relationships individuals maintain with their community and ancestors. This communal approach ensures that children grow up with a strong sense of belonging and interconnectedness to their culture, land, and people.
Healing is not just about addressing concerns with the physical body, but involves emotional, spiritual, and social wellbeing.
Traditional healing practices may include ceremonies, storytelling, and connecting with the land, which is considered a powerful source of spiritual healing. For Aboriginal people, healing is about restoring balance and harmony within the individual, family, and broader community.
This understanding aligns with the idea of holistic care and wellbeing, where the interconnectedness of mind, body, and spirit is central to health, especially in the context of childhood development.
Dance of life
As indicated on the table, the concept covers all major areas of life, named as dimensions - and each of them has five important components: traditional, historical, contemporary, gaps in knowledge, and solutions.
It is a very holistic way to map the health and wellbeing scenario, not only for the Aboriginal community, but so many aspects can be useful and valuable for other cultures.
In the Healing Foundation report, A Theory of Change for Healing (Healing Foundation, 2019), acknowledgement of the importance of cultural healing is stressed as essential: Healing activities can include yarning circles, gatherings, healing camps, counselling, art, dance, song, weaving, cultural ceremony and culturally safe referral pathways. Family and community healing are recognised as ‘integral to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples’ wellbeing.
As well as strengthening a sense of identity and connectedness, neuroscience demonstrates that cultural practices such as dance, art, song and storytelling stimulate the part of the brain that manages emotion and memory. Cultural practices that involve repetition and rhythm, such as weaving, playing didgeridoo, drumming and dance, are calming, trauma-informed processes that were central to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander life. Healing restores pride in cultural identity and connection to Country.
